VII
Brandolero wanted to introduce to your friends. So a week before Christmas I went to know. We agreed to meet in Quilca, in one of those stores Gothic, where his friend. His friends wore the same clothes as him, even the same hair, long hair that covered most of his face, but the difference was as follows. They were Gothic, and was only Brandolero Brandolero and wore clothes well and because it was cheaper and preferred not to spend their money on clothes if not cigarettes, in thousands of cigars.
by moths stayed a while in the old streets of Lima, they were no longer as before, were now more dangerous than alligators mud. Matiwasa Then, each home. Give few friends were disappearing. So we are left with one that was made in the image and likeness of Brandolero, a skinny type, hair that covered her up filthy mouth, talking nonsense like the above, Shit! It was his clone and could be that this also was equally Brandolero Conchudo that, I swear by snoopy, was the original version of Brandolero, I think that was very Brandolero bamba, What a paradox! Both smoked to everywhere, just Hamilton (eye) between them spoke typical causita causha or were a strange mix between hard punk and reggaeton, the two were like twins in the square of Q uilca up in the tone of his voice to the subject of their conversation and agreed they were innocent, no doubt the two were a couple of idiots, and I was one to be at his side Hamilton smoking like crazy.
- What now caushas plans? - Said Brandolero clone
As it was dark I had to look good, but very well to recognize if I spoke Brandolero or usurper.
- I do not know, I think it is a bit late to do plans.
- than later, "said Nada Brandolero-are Saturday, one week before Christmas, before making the semanesca, have to go for drinks .
- semanesca What? - Ask ironized
- Just as there are lent to Christmas semanesca also have a week where you do not make sin, to come clean to the birth of Manuelito.
- Huh? And that's where they taught you
- Lalo's father in college
- A natured brown?
- No, a fat, Blancon, like Bud Spencer, named Michael Leandro, I do not know why he said lalo
- Mmm
- Caushas, \u200b\u200byou have to make a pig pa pa to buy a warm drink, "interrupted the clone.
- lucas I only have three in my jean pocket, "said Brandolero
- to me or watch me, "I
- Brother, as a tip, I have my house payment, is here for two blocks.
- If cholo, look past your birthday is tomorrow, Lend alone, I put my only three lucas.
Two alligators tender - that persuaded me not existing.
- Yeah, look, I have only fifteen soles, nothing more.
- It does not matter, go ahead with the money causha.
I dropped my twine, or mad he would drop everything, you just let out a little, if no How the hell was going back home?
were, while I was sitting on a park bench, buy a drink. After a while again Pomalca white rum and cola Inca staff.
- What was it?
- here it is. Let my house to suck.
- If we Brandolero reaffirmed his house.
- What was? Let's take pure rum
- brother No, that's why we brought the Inca cola personal
- With that little thing?
- Enough ...
Left as asshole, yeah, like dude, I was spoiled by the bad apples, in this case were a couple of idiots and I another pedestrian was in full metamorphosis asshole, but one of those championship.
We arrived at the home of the clone. He opened his door with a key can pretty strange. We crossed a few clothes hanging on a clothesline, then a hallway lit by a blue light and then move to another which lit red, shit! It seemed a trip interspatial or just a brothel. On the way we met a guy who was swinging to and fro, seemed to be a fatal pea.
- Puta is my uncle, "said the clone
- Save, Save.
- No problem, until we can suck it.
kept walking and the guy stood before us
- Nephew "? "Nephew? Sobrino, lol!
- Dude, What happened?
- Nothing, I just got paid in the company, just finished roofing a house and all the workers we have paid up to twenty more for good job lucas .
- good!
- Señor buenas
- Señor buenas- dije también yo.
- ¿Tus amigos?- preguntó el enorme tío del clon
- Si tío mis amigos
- ¿Y que van ha ha ha ... do? Hip!
- Nothing, we are celebrating my birthday in advance
- Just go to take?
- Yes Why? - Said the clone
- pibas Is not there?
- No, no, we could not get
- No problem for Hip nephew ! That we got where Uncle Joroncho, this will be my birthday present
- Do not worry man, just enough to suck us
- Nothing, nothing, takes that shit suck pa germ Your still nothing right?
Brandolero and I listened to the conversation like two idiots.
- Do I nothing? - Said the clone
- Nothing, nothing
- Nothing?
- Nothing as asshole, or you have not broken gearbox, you have not thrown
- No, no gita
- Pucha but your friends as
- Nothing, they are decent - lied to the clone.
- Today I will submit indecent girls, spoiled, sapphires, broken sword, heated gourds, 2x1, big boys, outlaws, sandunga, taps, taster milk hand loose boxers, emeralds, hunting birds, mavericks, stabbed ...
- Huh?
- Putas, eg jerk, putas…
- Ya, ya, chevere tío, te pasaste.
Creo que a esta parte de la historia la debería llamar: “Y de repente el clon se emociono” pero nosotros qué pintábamos en ese entierro, en serio era un entierro, o iba a ser un entierro, nosotros seríamos los populares, violonchelistas, laucheros, chupamedias, testaferros, gallinazos. Bueno en fin, que nos tocaba perder, quizás hasta nos tocaba ganar con alguna mañosería de alguna de esas putas, but I was faithful to my wife, so I went with them but with the conviction that would not do anything here that would rout was the clone.
We left the house of the clone in the old car with which to taxi his uncle. That car was shit, had no horn. I asked him as Lord and can walk without a horn. For that I need a horn, sometimes I make the horn and a horn more straw, pull my head out the window and say, "I replied conchatumare progresses.
uncle arrived at the brothel Joroncho, we prepare a table and brought us a collection of whores. In I immediately thought, collectors of stamps are called philatelists, collectors of coins are called numismatists, collectors are called disc labels, collectors of whores How are they called? Haber, "Putaletista? "Putismatico? "Putisquero? Or simply "Son of a bitch?
- nephew already chosen, "said the uncle worker to Brandolero (Apparently he was wrong, they were so similar)
- Me? No thought, but just because
Before I must say that the clone was a leak a while.
- How come? This is a brothel asshole.
- is right.
Brandolero did not take long, because as I was jerk, stupid, stupid, Moncada all you want, unless dumb, I knew that at any moment going to get the clone and cagaría opportunity. Gave a quick glance at all, did not know any, but I opt for having a championship know us. Brandolero practice was first mountaineering, he played two huge mountains. Uncle transacted with the bitch, paid thing and let her supposed nephew was happy with the whore in the ass and taking his hands.
clone When it came, half embarrassed, I shit laughing.
- What was man?
- Nothing, I sent my nephew, so they get the rum to go suck.
- Huh? If I am your nephew
- Do not give me crap Chibolo Conchudo, do you think I will also pay a powder?
- Look, I'm your nephew ... Dude!
- I'm not going to be praying Chibolo bastard. Miss (called a finger) a jar of Cuba Libre. Cóbrese.
Another of the paradoxes of the night was that after the man was already very drunk, just realized that his nephew was in fact the clone had been left out. Confused ran to her room to bust the door bitch, along with his nephew did community strength, but the guards came from the brothel, a huachiman grabbed and pulled.
to me that I had no Brandolero follow and wait outside. Minutes later came Brandolero with a happy face. He had been one of the best fuck of her life.
- Great whore that was for me, my gift-object clone.
- No kidding, and let's go, that you get for jerk and do not ever touch me because you take out the conch ...
- you asshole fucked.
We took off the site. His uncle could do nothing because he was lying on the track for the effects of alcohol. Once on the road Brandolero fell asleep because I was so exhausted. We got home and everyone to sleep, it was too late.
I concluded, huddled on the bed that the clone had won an award that night, as Brandolero. As the clone had won the contest more asshole of the night, but yes, that award had no profit ...
Photo by me 
